Saturday, March 29, 2008

Stop Using Big Words You Don't Understand

Sesquipedalian predilections warrant interminable vigilance.

Verily, vivacious nomenclature decries salient considerations of distinguishability. Abandon waterlogged lexicons for perspicuous verbiage.

Discontinue inclinations toward Brobdingnagian libretto. Procure alternative bureaucratese.

Stop Blogging.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Don't Blog About Holidays

Stop writing about holidays and their meaning to you.

Easter celebrates rebirth, and there's nothing original about that. At this point, it's merely regurgitation. (And that's for the birds.)

You believe your material is heartwarming, topical, and original. We find it trite. In fact, it's easier to reconcile egg-laying rodents than it is to find value in your holiday post. 

Additionally, don't expect any sympathy on your rough, chocolate-free Lent. No one cares. We certainly don't. In fact, you could probably stand to lose some weight.

Start with your blog: Stop blogging.